F is for how I feel now...

Fine, I feel fine. Even though I have several moments of self doubt, I still feel... fine. I'm having one of those "Debbie Downer" days where every time I stop doing something, I starting thinking. Sometimes I think about good things, sometimes I think about bad -- usually either way I end up feeling weird about the entire thing.

I've been evaluating my life and where I am a LOT lately. For the most part I'm content, but I can't help but thing, "Could I be doing something entirely different right now?"

ALL I keep thinking about is photography. I've never been so intent on doing something in my entire life. Photography has always been there, following me wherever I go. I'm always taking pictures, I always find SOMETHING to take a picture of. If I'm sitting in a room by myself withing absolutely nothing in it, I'll find something to photograph.

That's what I am, that's what I do.

I've looked into NYIP and believe it to be something I could absolutely accomplish, but coming up with $1000 to blow on a photography course is an entirely different story. I think I need to start slow, photograph friends and family to build up a portfolio and then try to contract a couple photo sessions. Just enough to pay for a decent lens and the course.

When I'm not reevaluating my life, I'm worrying about my poor rat, Sally. Despite the fact that her fatal tumor is growing and causing her horrible jaw distortion, she still has a very happy and energetic disposition. She's gotten so much more energy lately -- which I couldn't be happier about -- that I think is from all the nutrients in all the baby food she's been eating. I try to feed her fresh baby food (and pudding) at least 3 times a day.

You never know when something is going to happen, so I want to make sure she always has options when it comes to eating.

All the other girls have respiratory problems, which I knew would happen. It is contagious, after all. And because of this, Melissa cannot have her mammary tumor removed. It has gotten much larger, unfortunately. She still gets around well, so there's no worries there as of yet.

Let me move from dark and dreary to something that's actually made me smile off and on all evening -- my cats! I went outside earlier to feed them (just after my aunt got here with her puppies) an just so happened to have my camera on me. I think I may have taken the best picture I've ever taken in my entire life!! I kid you not, hands down the absolute best. I doesn't make me feel any worse that it was taken in manual mode either.

Of course, I took a million other pictures today. More cats, some puppies, and just complete random crap. So, I guess I'm going to call it a day. I've been posting pictures all over Tumblr, Facebook, and Instagram -- all the while trying to play The Sims 4. Now I believe it's time for coffee and some SVU on Netflix. They do have 3 new seasons (13, 14, & 15) to watch, after all.

Love & Peace

-Megan

These are pictures from last night:

See that hideous burn I got from work?

Waiting for a snack of grilled chicken.

So are these prying eyes.

Now pictures from today:

This is Otis, he's very ornery and very cute.

This is Max, he's as sweet as pie.

Otis..

Max..

Puppy nap time with toys.

Miss Cersei.

Quite possibly the cutest pictures of Jasper... EVER!

And here it is... the best picture I've EVER taken! This is a total cat selfie, by the way.

Is she not gorgeous?

I love her so much and couldn't be happier that she's actually friendly now!

Poor Bart hates the camera.

Brothers.

I had the white balance in a different setting here, which is why it looks this way.

She looks petrified.

She loves sitting in boxes.

And drinking the dog's water.

Oven lights!

Ceiling lights!

And lastly, a pumpkin and chocolate chip muffin!